Keeping hearts open of vulnerable children and families during this process
, is well worth the investment. When there are multiple children involved, Neal and Judy often work with individual children, bringing parents and family members in as needed.
It can be very powerful to have professional support from therapists who have experienced separation and divorce, and stepfamily dynamics with their own children.
Note: We are also online counseling specialists who provide confidential online video counseling via skype and other services for divorced, stepfamily and blended families across the United States as well as international locations around the world.
Selections from
The Manual of Divorce
,
by Neal H. Brodsky
I wrote these poems one by one tracing the year in which my own divorce was completed. You, the reader will find a familiar cast – a wife, a husband, two young children, lawyers and lovers, therapists and friends.
My intention in publishing these poems together as “The Manual of Divorce” is to create an opening for what is possible when we observe and honor the occurrences of life as guides for our own growth. Amid the many things that happen in divorce is an opportunity to re-invent oneself and re-connect with your children.
We create and populate our world with perceptions of heroes and villains. All the while, the still small voice within speaks softly to us of love.
WHAT TO DO WITH KIDS (For Ann Barringer Spaeth)
Take your kids
to
the best
bookstore you can find
the one
(you know)
with at least one table
in the back
where you can
read to them
the
stories
you want to tell
as many as you can
till
you feel you’re
gonna
burst from
fatigue and joy
of sharing
words.
Cook
pasta
for
them
with
or without
sauce
which you can feed
to visiting
cats and dogs.
Pet these cats and dogs
after checking for rabies
and other communicable
pesky stuff.
And m
ake
great
crazy mixes of
things including but not limited to
cinnamonnutmegoreganosugar
honeyoatmealplaydough
andenoughwaterfromthetaptobond.
Peer into the darkness of
the old
cardboard raisin tin
which holds
all
then carefully
place the top back on
but only after
you’ve cut wholes
enough
for all this
to breathe and
grow.
two days
and forget.
wakes you in the night.
Pour this potion of love
into the toilet
and after stirring
to keep the pipes clear
flush
your
magic
down
into the river of
wishes and dreams.
~~~
MINUTES
“Stop the minutes”
says three year old Joey
watching the clock on my wall
countdown to the time he
must leave me.
They call this visitation
It is not.
It is child holding
father’s face
in his hands
gulping a last bowl of cereal
car running in the driveway
mama on the speaker phone
late
late
running late
running scared
running out
running now.
Stop the minutes says
three year old Joey.
It’s ok
Ok I say.
I want to pull the battery from
the clock
Stopping time.
I do.
Two days later I
still have
not replaced
the battery,
tears welling
in the place
where minutes
are lost
and never
returned.
~~~
CEDAR CHAIRS II
Four cedar chairs in old back yard
Adirondack chairs.
Five year old son Joey takes me out
to play in my old backyard.
Stacking chair upon chair
to make a house for us.
Old cedar chairs are missing.
screws to hold the arms
on to the body.
I want to go inside my old house
to get
a screw driver
but Joey is
chasing me around the chairs.
Duck. Duck. Goose.
Duck. Duck. Goose.
We run around the chairs
again and again
falling to the ground
hugging each other in this
the
only hour we will have together.
Duck. Duck. Goose.
Cedar chairs will break.
Duck. Duck. Goose.
Boys who run
will
mend.